Unrequited Love (Or Was It Simply Covetousness?)

I (Scott) took Clay and Brennan to the gym and dropped them off at the "Kid's Zone" while I worked out. When picking them up afterwards, Clay immediately mentioned that he had made a new friend. I asked, "Was it a boy or a girl, Clay?" to which Clay replied that it was a girl but that No, he did not get her name -- but he really liked her coat. Erm -- ok, so the mystery girl had a nice coat. Check.

Clay makes friends all the time so I didn't give it much more thought other than his curious fashion fascination. Later, as were playing in the pool, however, Clay began telling me about a little girl at the Kid's Zone that wasn't very nice. I said that I was sorry to hear that she wasn't nice -- but I hoped that Clay was polite when she wasn't nice. Clay proceeded to tell me that he was polite, but she kept saying that she didn't want to play with him. When pressed on this, Clay admitted that his response to her request for space was to . . . (wait for it) . . . follow her more closely. At that point, I explained to Clay that perhaps she was a perfectly nice little girl and that Clay was the one who wasn't being very nice by ignoring her repeated requests to bug off. Clay put that in his pipe and went off to smoke it.

Even later, as we were driving away from the gym, Clay began once again to discuss the little girl at the Kid's Zone who didn't appreciate Clay's reprisal of Seinfeld's "close-talker". I asked him why he was so interested in this little girl and he said, "Dad, I already told you. She had a really nice coat!" As he continued to describe her technicolor dreamcoat in increasing detail, the pieces all fell into place: His new "friend" was actually the object of a little preschool stalking -- apparently brought on by winter garment-envy.

Is it too early to begin explaining to him the finer points of a restraining order?